My Amazing Fake Day

Sea view

I’ve been intrigued by some blogs and articles about how Facebook makes people depressed because everyone else’s lives seem so perfect. I hope that no one thinks the sum of my life is reflected in two recent Facebook posts that my uncle killed a bear on our family farm in Southern Virginia and here in Northern Virginia, we are host a family of walking stick bugs. I took great comfort in the support from my friends through social media, and our blog readers, after the Navy Yard shootings. So yes, everyone knows my life isn’t perfect. But what if I could have an amazing fake workday just to post on Facebook? Here’s mine, a mixture of truth and fantasy:

4 AM: Rise to read and ponder passages of my Schofield Bible, followed by prayer.

5 AM: Polish furniture, remembering the Benedictine rule to dedicate each task to God.

6 AM: Eat breakfast with Hubby before he goes to work. Afterwards, meditate upon a maxim of St. Teresa of Avila. Today’s Maxim: Never mention anything concerning thyself which men account praiseworthy, such as learning, goodness, birth, unless with a hope of going good thereby, and then let it be done with humility, remembering that these are gifts of God.

6:30 AM: Continue reading Tozer: Mystery of the Holy Spirit.

7 AM – Noon: Catch up on business emails, blogs, and calls, including fielding several contracts with healthy offers for clients. Take a break to touch base with both daughters, Hubby, Momma and Daddy, and mother-in-law. On some days, this time slot may also include church work.

Noon: Lunch with a girlfriend at my home. I will serve tuna salad I made scooped into avocado and tomato strategically placed on Grandma’s china. Dessert will be a refreshing sorbet I made from organic berries.

1:30 PM: Iron Hubby’s shirts.

2-6 PM: Continue negotiations, make submissions, help assistant clear slush pile. Retrieve mail to find several checks but no bills or junk. Call clients. Under no circumstances will anything frivolous such as shoes be discussed.

6 PM: End of the workday. Greet Hubby and go with him to the gym. Then we get to hang out.

Your turn:

What would your amazing fake day look like?

Do you think people share too much information on social media? Or not enough?

Are you bothered by the images people portray on social media? What would you change?

Do you like to argue politics and religion on social media, or do you let comments that offend you pass?

22 Responses to My Amazing Fake Day

  1. Amber Mauldin October 24, 2013 at 3:54 am #

    Great post!! I did one several months ago titled “no robots allowed”. As Christians we struggle with too little and too much info. Once I made a comment on fb about my m.I.l. over-feeding my kids and sending them home w/ belly aches. She’s not on Fb but I had a phone call bright and early the next morning. She heard from so and so who heard from so and so…. you get the picture. Just silly stuff. I keep a very superficial life on Fb now :/ there are just too many “frienamies” waiting to twist your words into something else. It’s sad but true. I have close friends I text when I need to be a flawed human, which is quite often ;)

    • Tamela Hancock Murray October 24, 2013 at 6:05 am #

      Amber, it’s hard to believe the extent to which some people will take offense at Facebook posts but you’ve given us a good reminder. Your “secret” about the bellyaches is safe here with just us industry professionals. ;)

  2. Jennifer Zarifeh Major October 24, 2013 at 5:26 am #

    Hahaha! Tamela, that was great! Tozer, St. Teresa AND ironing?! All in one day!!

    Here’s mine…

    6am: Awaken to the sounds of the ship docking in Civitavecchia, Italy. Get up and watch the pilot boats maneuver the 16 deck Equinox into port. Shower and dress.
    6:45am: Breakfast buffet in the Ocean View Cafe. Choose fresh croissants and bacon, scrambled eggs with cream, melons, berries and of course, Earl Grey.
    7am: Put in contacts, apply perfect make-up. Do hair so well people take photos.
    7:15am: arrive in theatre, ready to be escorted to air conditioned tour bus for the 90 minute drive into Roma.
    9:45am: arrive in Roma, drive past the breath-taking scenery and weep at the sight of the Colosseum.
    10am-12pm: tour Trevi Fountain and the Roman Forum. Smile at my benevolence as I hand a weeping Texan a Canadian quarter to toss into fountain. The rule at the ancient fountain is -One coin for love, two coins for marriage, three for a quick divorce. I gave her ONE coin.
    12:30pm-1:30pm- Lunch at the Hotel Mediterranean, downtown Roma.
    2pm: arrive at the Colosseum, tour group goes in ahead of line, endures jealous sneers of the peons.
    3:45: walk up to and into Vatican, up past the lines of more peons. Take copious photos of Swiss Guards.
    4pm: Sistine Chapel. Not bad. It ain’t bad. Seriously. Kinda pretty even.
    5pm: Stuck in traffic. Apparently it was the new Pope’s first Papal Audience. Hello? I’m hungry and it’s a 90 minute drive BACK to the ship!!
    6:30pm: RUN, the whole busload of us, to Deck 2 security and flop as we make it back into decent A/C. Really, those Italian 5 star tour bus people need to crank the air.
    7pm: Dinner in the cafe. TOOO much trouble to dress for the dining room.
    9pm: sit on the deck chair on our sunset view balcony, watch the sun set over the Med. Thank the Lord tomorrow is a sea day, because my credit card is TIRED.

  3. Kay Shostak October 24, 2013 at 6:35 am #

    Love it – have you ever seen “Christmas in Connecticut” with Barbara Stanwyck? It was filmed in 1945, but I often think of it when reading amazing fb entries or unbelievable (literally) blogs. Great movie, my fav at Christmas. (Oh, she’s a writer.)

  4. Meghan Carver October 24, 2013 at 6:44 am #

    Now which is truth and which is fantasy, Tamela? And does it really matter? Why are we so constantly comparing ourselves to others? I love your fake day. Polishing the furniture at nearly any time of the day would be fake for me. :)

  5. Nancy B. Kennedy October 24, 2013 at 7:06 am #

    9 a.m. Wake up and stretch, looking out over the sea from my thatched cottage in Cornwall.

    10 a.m. Full English breakfast (minus the blood sausage.)

    11 a.m. Read in my back garden overlooking the sea. Any book that came in the post from my favorite bookseller in London.

    1 p.m. Practice the piano, which is in an alcove under the stairs in my front parlor.

    2 p.m. Read. Anywhere.

    4 p.m. Break for high tea brought into the sitting room on a trolley. Tea sandwiches and scones with Devonshire clotted cream and strawberry jam.

    5 p.m. Take a walk through the village and up the path to the cliffs overlooking the sea. Complete errands at the shops on the high street on the way home.

    7 p.m. Light a coal fire in the library. Read.

    9 p.m. Stroll back down through the village to the local pub for bangers and mash, mushy peas, and a pint.

    10 p.m. Watch something from the BBC on the telly.

    11 p.m. Read.

    Midnight. Retire for the night.

  6. Tammy Doherty October 24, 2013 at 7:22 am #

    Love it! My amazing fake day would NEVER start at 4 a.m.!! Even if I want to impress people, that’s too early :D But my fake day would include taking a nice long walk in the morning before work, eating a perfect healthy breakfast, followed at noon by an even more incredibly healthy (and appetizing) lunch. After work, I’d help the kids with their homework, work on land for project with my son, then go for a long walk with him. We’d admire the foliage and fauna while I teach him about the environment. I’d wrap up the day with a “to-die-for-but-still-healthy” supper, which is appreciated and devoured by all family members. We’d have a little family time and then all off to bed.

    Yeah, if only I could manage one or two of those things in reality!! I used to feel like a heathen compared to my Christian online friends. Then I talk to them privately and find out their just like me – flawed and trying not to show it too much. I flaunt some of my flaws on FB…like spilling coffee, filling the house w/smoke from using the self-cleaning function on the oven (for the first time EVER!), etc. But I work at not airing dirty laundry on social networks.

  7. Candy Arrington October 24, 2013 at 7:28 am #

    You iron? Really? I gave that up years ago!

    Regarding facebook, I think people share way too much about their health and politial views and vent about things that should never be discussed in an open forum. I don’t appreciate pictures of cuts, boils, or other bodily injuries and I’m not sure why folks think we want to see those pictures. Also, detailed information about medical tests and the prep thereof.

    I sometimes wonder if certain posts are fantasy, what people wish their lives were like and are trying to convince themselves and others they are.

    On the other hand, I’ve been able to connect with people I haven’t seen in years and stay in touch with far-flung family members. For that I am grateful.

    • Tamela Hancock Murray October 24, 2013 at 7:35 am #

      Candy: Yes, I really do iron!

      I don’t have FB friends posting pictures of injuries. You must hang out with a different FB circle than I do. LOL

      Sometimes I think people forget that FB is an open forum. Sort of like celebrities who go off on politics when they’re interviewed on talk shows. Why make enemies when you don’t have to?

  8. Rachel Muller October 24, 2013 at 7:38 am #

    Loved reading this post and the comments by other bloggers. I’ve often wondered if other people think my life is picture perfect because I do not vent my problems on FB or complain about my kids. I have strong convictions against using social media to release all my frustrations for the ‘world’ to see.

    In reality, I live a very exciting, eventful, stressful, sometimes sad but wonderful life. I just choose not to exploit my private life and trials.

    My perfect day would look like this:

    Get the kids off to school and be home by 8:30 a.m. to have breakfast with my hubby, who is able to stay at home with me because my novel has just topped the bestseller’s lists. :)

    After breakfast we’d enjoy a brisk walk outside before coming indoors so I can sit down and write my heart out, only breaking for lunch.

    After the children come home from school we’ll enjoy a nice sit down meal together and re-cap our day, laughing in between stories. We’d enjoy the rest of the evening by sitting out on the front porch with sweet tea until the sun sets then we gather the brood for family devotions and prayer time.

    I’d hire a housekeeper so that inside house work didn’t keep me from writing.

  9. Patrick October 24, 2013 at 7:46 am #

    My Amazing Fake Day

    6:00am Wake up and read from God’s Word

    6:15 Crawl out of my sleeping bag into the dark chill of the early morning and dress for the day

    6:30 Sit by a small campfire with some warm bread and a steaming cup of coffee to warm me as I watch God paint the sky with its morning colors.

    7:30 Pack up my things and load them into my canoe

    7:45 Sit by the water’s edge and take in the inspiration to write what God puts on my heart as the small waves lap at the shoreline.

    8:30 Push the canoe out into the clear water and jump aboard.

    8:35 – 12:30pm Paddle around the edge of a beautiful serene lake or down a gentle river while taking in the beauty of God’s creation.

    12:30 Pull the canoe on shore and lay in under the golden sun while enjoying a light snack

    12:45 Take a restful nap under the warmth of the sun while the gentle breeze wafts through the trees

    1:00 Take in more of God’s precious Word

    1:30 Return to the open water and continue to marvel at the wonders around me

    5:00 Pull back to shore and set up camp

    5:30 Once again by a gentle fire, sing hymns of joy to the Lord

    6:00 Cook and eat a wonderful camp meal and give thanks to God for the wonderful day

    6:30 With pen and pad continue to write what God has put on my heart throughout the day

    7:00-9:00 Put all my cares away and sit quietly by the fire while God paints the sky with the setting sun, cleans the canvas and sculpts the night sky. Singing hymns and songs and praising Him

    9:00 Crawl into my tent and then into my sleeping bag and rest

  10. Valerie Comer October 24, 2013 at 8:00 am #

    Love it! Your post gave me an idea of what to write for mine on Friday. Whew! Already scheduled and ready to air: My Fictional Day. Thanks for the idea and for the glimpse into your REAL life, lol.

    • Rachel Muller October 24, 2013 at 8:13 am #

      LOL, Valerie. Can’t wait to read that post! :)

  11. Jeanne Takenaka October 24, 2013 at 8:41 am #

    What a fun post, Tamela. I’m with Jennifer—all that wonderful quiet time, meditating and reflecting AND ironing? I don’t remember the last time my iron saw the light of day.

    My fake perfect day would include:
    Perfect behavior from my two children who would, of course, never complain about what I cook for supper, and would treat each other with kindness at all times. And, they would do their homework without complaining.

    It would include time to write a few thousand words on my wip and revise my manuscript. It would include the best-ever, most romantic date with my hubby, somewhere in the mountains, accompanied with beautiful photos. Of course.

    This was a fun post. And it was fun to try to decipher truth from fiction in your fake day. :)

  12. Stephen Myers October 24, 2013 at 8:46 am #

    I don’t have the creativity or the time to post a fake day or a real day. Life for me is lived out in real time and not in social media very often. I don’t care what one has for breakfast, where they are having breakfast or what their favorite cup of coffee is… let alone some photo or art work on coffee. Or chocolate. Nothing on politics. No ‘if you love Jesus or want Jesus to bless you pass this on,’ stuff. It takes effort but I hide most posts of people to focus on the real things of life like PRAYER ISSUES or something PERSONAL. I try to stick to BUSINESS as well. I’ll ask questions or provide thoughts how we can be more effective in writing, marketing and promoting in shorter time spans.

    One of those issues recently was on book trailers. And using broadcast and journalism skills to turn what essentially are slide shows and often ones that are too long into quicker :30 commercials. Its a competition for eyes and time. Even online ads are less than 10 to 15 seconds. The question if people really have a minute or several to watch a slide show let alone read something. I have to compliment the Laube Blogs as they are all relatively short, to the point and dependable for relevant content. It (and one other site) are my only subscriptions.

    Social media in some ways has become the fwd e-mails of my parents (retiree’s) generations. Every few weeks I have to weed out my 82 year old mother’s account from her 2-3 friends that send several dozen fwds a day. She does not have the patience to read them and are counter for the reason of setting up an e-mail account for her to stay in letter contact with her friends. She does better with a telephone (and frankly so do I). I keep contact with good friends in conversations and in person. Will pray for someone who lists in social media, celebrate something professional or personal with them and love the less than a minute summary of photos of family or friends. But of the ‘Fake,’ and ‘Junk,’ it takes real work to hide as much as possible from my eyes and relegate time once a day to weed through it for the relevant and important things.

    For me the computer is to write and write novels. And now to work!

  13. Carol McClain October 24, 2013 at 9:03 am #

    I would LOVE to be able to respond to this post, but I’m in the midst of a world-wide, whirlwind tour for my new book which coincides with the debut of the movie made from my debut, Pulitzer Prize winning novel. My agent (from the Laube agency, of course) insists I should not post anything on a public site because it will open me to stalking and would probably jam your webpage.

    When the tour ends, I’ll be in touch again. Cheers.

  14. Teresa-Rae October 24, 2013 at 9:48 am #

    Hi Tamela, I envisioned myself tagging along with you on your amazing fake day. The latte I sipped while chatting with you as you ironed was delicious. Your husband is wonderfully attentive to you and a gentleman. Thank you for including me. It was a great fake day.

  15. Dawn Kinzer October 24, 2013 at 10:10 am #

    Some people don’t know how to use a filter when sharing their lives or opinions on Facebook, and what they reveal can be uncomfortable for readers. On the flip side, when someone is portraying a perfect life, my gut tells me they’re choosing to avoid telling what’s really going on. That’s okay with me. A good friend of mine’s life on Facebook looked perfect, but I knew she was struggling with marital problems. Does she need to put that out there for the world to see? I don’t think so.

    I strive to find a balance of being vulnerable without crossing boundaries. Besides inviting readers into my life, I like to share things that have the potential to benefit others in some way. Posts that encourage, inspire, educate, or brighten their day.

    I tend to stay away from controversy regarding politics and religion. I’m not on Facebook to create conflict. When I see Christians bashing the president, another religion, sexual preference, etc., it makes me sick inside.

    Oh … I iron too! Friends think I’m crazy! ;-)

  16. Patti Jo Moore October 24, 2013 at 6:46 pm #

    Loved this, Tamela! :) And I would especially enjoy your tuna salad on Grandma’s china. ;)

  17. Debby Mayne October 25, 2013 at 3:40 am #

    My amazing fake day would include a nice, long walk in 70-degree weather, reading a great book by one of my many favorite authors, and either Mexican or Thai food for dinner. Oh, and to join you and your other pals for lunch.

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